you're finally here and i'm a mess

when I can’t sleep because my mind races with thoughts of what I must do, what I should do, what I could do and what I want to eat- I feed my insomnia by looking at your tumblr pages. You guys are so interesting.

gummy worms are nutritious,

no one has a muffin top,

my cat doesn’t poop in my living room every so often,

instrument mastering only requires a deep desire to do so,

the term & place “supper club” doesn’t exist,

anyone can talk to anyone,

milkshakes make your skin look luminescent,

teleportation is cheap & easy,

time travel is possible,

I have a timeshare on Saturn,

there is a pinot noir tree in my backyard,

everyone has a home- especially veterans,

everyone gets a fair shot,

everyone gets to meet their highschool crush again when you turn 25 and you’re hot,

it is common to give flowers to strangers,

some mattress stores sell giant, non-rotting, pitless avocado halves for you to sleep in,

adults realize that small children are more intelligent than they are,

the moon sings in Italian,

there are no octupi - ESPECIALLY not psychic ones,

we solve wars with pillowfights,

no DJ ever says “everybody screeeam!”

animals talk,

candles don’t run out and light themselves automatically when sexy time is about to happen,

Zach Anner has a tv show,

no one wants to be famous,

people don’t tattoo their faces,

bounce houses are readily available at all adult parties,

adult doesn’t automatically mean porn,

no one is embarrassed of their singing voice,

everyone meets their soulmate the second they’re ready to,

soulmates exist,

& pizza is good for you.